I hate flying

Not only do I hate flying, but I hate waiting at the airport. Why is it that a 2 hour flight to Chicago can take 10 hours door to door? Flights to Chicago are always delayed and flights from Chicago are always delayed.
And when you finally get on the plane, you sit on the runway for an hour or so before you finally take off.
Now is when the fun stuff begins. As we take off the plane is shaking and we are clearly in for some turbulence. I don't like it, it scares me. I know that flying is safer than driving, but I am still scared. And then I start to pray. And I am usually not a very praying person. But for some reason I think that if I pray to God I will be safe. So my prayer goes something like this, "Please Dear God, make sure we land safely. If you can do that I promise I will never again ask to wake up skinny and I will most definitely be a better person. And if you can't get us home safely, please make sure we all die together. Please please, pretty please with sprinkles on top."
I don't know if it does any good, but we got home safe and I didn't wake up skinny!